Amazed, stunned, shocked… you name it……

Current mood: satisfied
Category: Life

Ok so one thing I didn't write about Friday is worthy today of me hossing on about today…..daft tale I know but had me giggling all the same.

I came home from work Friday to find that a highways engineer has been spraying the footpaths outside the old 'abode' in the intention to start some sort of works… hmmm, my mind starts whirring. I had been toying for a while now with the idea of converting quite a large amount of the grass in the somewhat useless front garden into a driveway for parking of the car which has two main benefits to me…

1. The less grass there is, the less this lazy trout has to cut during summer.

2. The car will be safer from the large amounts of wrinklies who live round here, who – to be honest really shouldn't be driving these days and cant park for shit... hence, saving my "Reg the Renault" from yet more dints, scrapes, slaps, prangs and clouts that I haven't already noticed or added to myself J

I telephoned seeing if I could sneak in getting my dropped kerb for a driveway done at the same time at the cheap "Oi, I work for a council too" rate … heh heh

A very helpful chap called Adam told me it wouldn't be a problem and he would get a quote out to me asap so I could decide if I wanted it done or not.

I phoned him Monday to make sure all was still going through and he assured me the job was going to be done in the next couple of weeks so had plenty of time…

So…… imagine my total and utter surprise when at just gone 7am this morning a bang on the door drags me out of the shower. There stands a burley, somewhat grubby chap in fluorescent clothing asking in a northern accent if I could move my car as they would be digging up the foot path this morning.

I agreed to move the car within 10 mins and sod off to work out of their way.

To this my thoughts were.. "shit, that was bit quick, maybe I've missed my chance here" so got to work and rang Adam again. He sounded just as surprised as me but said to leave it with him and he would ring back later…

He rang back saying he had sorted it, got me a price which he had emailed to me and it could go ahead! Hoofuckingrah! what a good lad!

So I am posting off a cheque tomorrow of which wont even have gone through by the time its done!

Damn fine work - well done Adam J

Never did get a council discount though….

Other than that, I managed to get home and start on the red wine on an "empty all day" stomach… oh dear. I have now managed to eat some tea which has helped the feeling of somewhat drunkenness that kicked in quite severely but much better now J

Right its still only 7pm and I'm trollied…might just have to go watch a DVD then… should be a safe bet.

Currently watching: V for Vendetta (Widescreen Edition) Release date: 01 August, 2006

I’ve only just noticed…

Current mood: calm
Category: Life

I haven't been on here talking crap since Friday! Heavens woman, what ever is the matter with you?

To be honest I had a weenie bit of a guilt pang Saturday morning and finally got off my arse and started to plod through the everlasting list of stuff I had been ignoring for bloody ages.

Evidently, the wildlife sanctuary's website has been updated, my bungalow is spotless, and all washing and ironing has been done. I had a sort out of a load of old clothes I won't wear anymore and gave to Mumsie, did a bit of work I had been meaning to get done when I had time, dragged the big old Christmas trees that were dumped in my front garden a month ago round the back ready to chainsaw up (nope still haven't done that yet but getting there) and even wandered up the road as a neighbour asked if I would fit her aerial back onto her chimney as the wind had blown it off last week. She needs a new one so roll on roof walking this weekend instead.

And, the ultimate treat, sat down at 8pm to watch the first of the new series of TopGear on BBC2. What a good girl! (For once)

I have also managed to add to my fitness regime – Hmmm this is getting scary now…. I have acquired, thanks to the weirdest turn of events with the three women of my family, a "lateral thigh trainer" thingy. For me this thing is great, no impact and something I can do in the living room in front of the TV! Hoorah! I can honestly say I no longer feel guilty watching all of the TopGear repeats now, as every time I watch them I'm plodding along on the trainer…

I'll have thighs like a bleeding kangaroo soon at this rate.

Monday at work was interesting as per usual. We are having networking problems in our building at the moment which has pretty much scuppered everything to do with computers left right and centre. Not too bad for me as I can sod off over to the call out lads office and work on my laptop from there… oh ever the efficient one me. Managed to get a load of tat done in peace and quiet, lovely stuff. Today was a surveying day and the "beardy weirdy team" (yes, I am weirdy) got a shitload done, of which what's left is an early hours job this Sunday morning again. (Rubs hands together thinking of the money – heh heh)

Also covered call out for Dave this evening so until about 10 minutes when he phoned to say he was on his way home and I can finally have a glass of wine…. And this evening's choice is: L'Artisan Produit De France – Saint Chinian.

Quite a dry red which, to be honest I think has a taste of sports socks to it on the first glass, but that does pass after the 4^th one J

So I can chill out now. I have done my hour's stint on the stepper (very handy as I was cold as a penguin's bollocks after today) and watch a bit of telly… then off to land of nod once again.

Currently watching: Anger Management (Full Screen Edition) Release date: 16 September, 2003

Today has given me the warm and fuzzies

Current mood: accomplished
Category: Life

Even though it's been bleeding manic today, it's all been worth it and I will sleep like a brick tonight

(yes, probably snoring like a train too)

Today my parents paid off what was left of my mortgage and I will be paying them back the remainder direct, with no interest. I can honestly say going into the Woolwich with a massive cheque like that really did leave me with a grin right across my face.

I appreciate this so much Mum & Dad, like you wouldn't believe…

Thank you J

Then I managed to get a karma response in return this evening (granted not quiet as dramatic or costly but made me feel great)

A lass at work was downsizing houses and had a 32" widescreen/ flat screen TV for sale for £50. I rang earlier in the week and was told I could collect it tonight – superb!

I went to pick it up and it's fucking HUGE, in superb condition and I handed over the cash quick smart and toddled off with it…

Got to Mum & Dads to pick up the hooligan and sat there looking at their 28" wide screen and thought; "Dads got really crap eye sight, and their living room is much bigger than mine…." The words fell out of my mouth:

"why don't you two have the 32" one in the van, and I'll have your smaller one?"

It's installed, still fucking huge and Dad can see it a treat.

My work here is done today.

Weird bird warning

Current mood: ditzy
Category: Life

This evening I am drinking "Delusional Vodka & Coke"

Now just in case you have never heard of this particular tipple (which isn't surprising seeing as I just made it up) it consists of a glass with ice and some coke. Yep the delusional part is the vodka of which I cannot partake in due to being on call. Bugger.

Well, the thought was there I suppose.

Started this evening to get through the mountain of washing I have accumulated thanks to being a lazy trout and going away on holiday for 4 days. Amazing just how much you can get through when you can't be arsed to slap it through the machine – or either that I just don't have time. I am starting to regret it I must admit as struggled to find a clean pair of "boy shorts" this morning and had to resort to a pair of normal knickers of which for me these days is rare I can tell you. At least I have made a start I suppose, better than chuff all.

So what other joyous things have happened today? Managed to break a cd case this morning with quiet a lot of artistic talent. I had borrowed a CD from a friend at work, one of those double cd things with the case that interlocks on itself so it's still the same size as a standard one. Very clever but just could not stand up to the 'clumsy cow' factor first thing this morning. I had the case all opened out across my lap sitting here at my PC about to retrieve the CD from the drive when the mobile blipped at me, I reached over to grab the phone, slid off my chair in the same direction lumped my elbow on the printer then smacked my knee on the drawers, only to lean onto said case snapping the insert bit clean off its piddly plastic stalks holding it in the main case. Bollocks.

Its never happens to your own CD's does it? Always someone else's who has trusted you enough to not thieve it and twat here hands it back this morning bollocksed…

Such a charmer me. Hell I figured the CD's were still serviceable so wasn't all bad. (Sorry Sara L)

So I figure I should at least post a couple of photos of Switzerland hadn't I?

Yes, I struggled up here....

Mumsie and Sandy, playing silly buggers

We wandered a lot....

Well fills up a space doesn't it…

Washing calls.....

Currently listening: Love, Loss, Hope, Repeat

Work, adverts and general talking complete twaddle.

Current mood: complacent
Category: Life

Ahhh yes, work. Don't you just love it? Being back there today has been like pulling out a painful tooth. You know you have to do it but hate the build up, the actual happening and the ending of it is always an anti climax. Oh well. One good point came out of today though, we managed to (for the first time) tax one of the vans I look after online saving me countless hours fucking about getting a cheque raised, queuing for hours in the city centre post office then getting funny looks when trying to establish I do actually work for NCC and am not just trying to fleece them into giving it to me. I would say that the extra £2.50 added to the price for using a credit card was worth the amount of time they pay me for fucking about… wow… saving money, who would have thought?

Glad to be home, even if I am sober due to call out, but still have a huge amount of stuff to load into the van from the Sunday survey this evening… what a treat, out in the snow/cold trying to get everything in it… hmmm delay that for another hour yet me thinks. I have however decided I will NOT watch two TopGear repeats again tonight so as to make sure I actually get this shit done.

..

So getting onto adverts, here in the UK at the moment, they have started yet again with a bombarding of adverts to encourage people to give up smoking. Not that these bother me, I choose to pay attention or not and mostly it's the latter. The tact they have gone with this time is to use the fact that people are "hooked" to cigarettes and to emphasise this they show people being dragged outside by a big arse fishing hook and line by the mouth just to go out to feed their addiction. Good tactic, advert makes sense even if a bit yucky & I hope someone got paid handsomely for it, however I did giggle when logging onto My space this evening to see animated versions have appeared on here too. The advert is pretty much the same but you get to grab the line with your mouse and drag it away at a funny old angle which in turn starts the person talking about how addicted they are blah blah blah. There is only one downside to the computerised versions, they haven't made the worlds greatest efforts at the graphics of movement in the faces, in fact have used big hefty chunks of face, that – to be honest in the case below doesn't give to woman in question the nicest looking face, in particular her now triple chin!

I'm very sure the woman in question is not very amused with the outcome… I would be mortified!

Right, time I stopped talking complete tat and went and cooked some tea! Bloody starving!

Currently listening: Pulp Fiction: Music From The Motion Picture By Various Artists Release date: 27 September, 1994

Oh joy….

Current mood: crappy
Category: Travel and Places

Yes, home safe and sound and mentally preparing myself for work tomorrow *sigh*

The trip however was superb. Flight out was slightly bumpy and the landing was something even an F1 driver would have been proud off. Seems there was a rather hefty side wind hossing across the runway, as coming in to land somewhat "on the squiff" granted, we touched down and did what felt like the largest handbrake turn to straighten us up again… added to that the huge amount of tilt which had us all thinking one of the wings was going to start scraping along the floor… many a cheek was nipping.

We did all however have great fun wandering about, playing in a spa thingy place with an inside/outside pool… fantastic stuff if not somewhat chilly in the "even warmer than average" January afternoon air however with quiet a few overly heated pools to melt in inside… just like a huge bath really – with jets that look like everyone's farting like a good'un. Hmmmmmmm

Had a slight bout of illness Sunday afternoon, which successfully had me asleep for 5 hours whilst everyone was out walking round town and as with most of my other trips copious amounts of wine, vodka and beer consumed.

The trip was a great success and a much appreciated break… but now after my day of rest… saying goodbye to a colleague who was leaving today… I now have to get my shit together ready to go back to work tomorrow… urghhhhhh.

A photo or two will be posted when I can "quite frankly" be arsed as at the moment I cant.

Currently reading/watching/listening/playing: Top Gear

Just before I go….

Current mood: bouncy
Category: Life

Well, I couldn't just sod off to Switzerland without showing you the hair cut now could I?

No laughing now….

BEFORE:

AFTER:

One of these days I may learn… but I doubt it.

Back next week....

Currently listening: Wish You Were Here By Pink Floyd Release date: 25 April, 2000