Banks, lights, oysters, bollocks and not paying attention.

Current mood: uncomfortable
Category: Life

Seems nothing goes right sometimes. I have acquired yet another cold, so have head full of snot, sneezing like a kin good un' (for example see video's section) a sore throat which has lead to a voice of Barry White, which makes for very interesting reactions when people on the other end of a telephone realise they are actually talking to a bird and not a hairy arsed truck driver from Leeds.

Then, I get home tonight and find out that one of the standing orders I set up to pay mumsie back for the mortgage never arrived at her end… which wouldn't have been so bad bit the fuckers has gone from my end…. Hmmmm.

After investigating, it has now come to light that on setting up said standing order online when asking for her account number the bloody box will only let me put in 8 digits. All very well and good but my bloody mothers account has got 10. Bollocks. Evidently I didn't notice this when filling it in and there were two digits missing so some lucky fucker has got £250 to play with until I go into my branch and squawk tomorrow. Great – yet more tat to put right. Life is just sooo simple isn't it?

So what did I fail to tell you about over the weekend? Ahhh yes. Tesco and their amazing ability to balls up something relatively simple and the knock on effect it had on everything else.

My "slot" for delivery was between 9AM – 11AM. Now normally they always seem to arrive within the first half hour of that slot which would have been really handy as I had sorted out going and putting up the welfare officers new light for her. Yep, you've guessed it they turned up at ten to eleven and tried to palm me off with a crate which was obviously not mine (I spotted this very quickly as even if I was pissed I would never have ordered kiddies munch bunch fromage fras for sure – well that and the 4 pint bottle of full fat milk - urrrghhhh)

The delivery drivers reaction was a classic "oh they've buggered up the packing of the crate…" I did wonder if this really was the case as none of the bags actually had my name on them….

about

So after a phone call to the driver from head office, he comes to tell me they have delivered my fridge stuff to this other woman and visa versa, so were then going back to hers to get mine. Great the only day I needed to get out of the bloody house as soon as they had left and I now had to wait for them to fix their fuck up. Great.

Half an hour later my fridge stuff arrived… correctly… so couldn't complain… out the door like a shot to do the light.

Now the electrical changing of the light took all of 15 minutes. I was most pleased with this and was hoping to be out of there by half an hour at the latest. HOWEVER, the light fittin gin question was a Laura Ashley one… all very pretty and such like but had over 50 little glass tear drop things on the shade, all packed in their own little piece of wrapping foam and sellotaped round for protection. It took me another 45 bloody minutes just to get each of those little buggers off!!!! Wahhhhhhhh… no fair.

So it's now Wednesday – I am tired, snotty and in need of a cuddle for some strange reason… don't ask me why, never am normally – maybe it's the cold…?

On a plus note, heard back about the job interview and they want me to go for an assessment day on March 20^th. Worth going in for a look at least I'd say.

Currently listening: Costello Music By Fratellis Release date: 13 March, 2007

WHHHHAAAATTTTT!?!?!?!?

Current mood: drunk
Category: Life

It's been an evening of pizza, potato waffles, wine and phone calls it seems.

I treated myself to some new wine glasses Saturday and they are much bigger than the old ones (good point number 1)

The tea wasn't anything exciting I must admit but did fill me up nicely enough to not allow me to pass out within 5 mins of having the biggest arsed glass of wine when I got home J

This evening's choice is a red as been drinking white all weekend…

La Resistance (ohhh sounds exciting)

Coteaux Du Languedoc. Smells of tobacco (or maybe that's my fag in my hand) and tastes of "draws you arse up to your elbows" liquid nitrogen…. Good combination I can tell you.

So, phones not stopped since I got home (little miss popular this evening) So now it's calmed to hell down again decided to listen to something different as well…..Tchaikovsky's 1812 overture. Can't beat it.

So no guessing I'm a tadge tiddly now but worthy of an Oscar ;)

Other than that I'm tip top, and happy as a cheese noodle.

How are all of you? Answers on a postcard please:

POBOX lost the plot

Norwich

Currently listening: Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart: Complete Works (170 CD Box Set) By Mozart Release date: 25 October, 2005

That surprised me.

Current mood: surprised
Category: Life

In my amazing pile of groceries I ordered earlier in the week was my little treat to myself… I order cheap DVD's to boot. Good ole' Tesco's...:

Considering 3 out of the 6 didn't arrive due to being "out of stock" the three that did arrive were "For the moment" for the pricey cost of 97p…. Coyote ugly (which I am watching right now) and Jarhead (which finished 20 mins ago.)

Soooooo who would have thought that a film like Jarhead would have such a profound effect. I can only say that the main reason that films really affect me is the music, the soundtrack… anything musical. Music is my soul.

Jarhead did that.

It made me cry at the end.

End of babble… coyote getting interesting….

Currently watching: Jarhead (Widescreen Edition) Release date: 07 March, 2006

Chaos, pandemonium & feeling very sorry for myself due to alcohol

Current mood: contemplative
Category: Life

It's been bloody mental the last few days and by Christ am I glad it's now Saturday.

Thursday night I went along to the local Red Card Comedy Club… this in itself was superb and was certainly worth it but it's the whole rig moral of getting myself somewhere for the night drinking. Living in the arse end of nowhere makes for a real shit if you want to go into Norwich drinking. So as per usual I organised myself to stay at my parents for the night.

Not a problem in itself but with "somewhat hung-over" status of Friday I managed to forget to take my mobile to work, forget to take change in with me and on two occasions left my diary lying about in the different bits I was working in that day.

On top of that it was a colleagues leaving drinky Friday from lunchtime onwards… I was already pre book by mumsie for the evening so couldn't go on yet another complete bender (which after the night before probably wasn't a bad idea… ) I did pop in to see him off for a while at lunch having a nice glass or two of delusional vodka and coke… and to be honest by the lunchtime I was feeling like total and utter cack… yes, all self inflicted I know.

Evidently after getting home I curled up on the sofa under a duvet and gone… out like a light.

Today – I am not surprisingly after a shitload of sleep feeling much better! Good news is, Tesco's are delivering my groceries this morning… Yay! Bad news is I then have to get off my arse and go and fit a light for a friend from work… which isn't bad in itself but I don't do getting off my arse as a rule on the weekend so will take great effort. The reason I have agreed to do this? It's for the Welfare officer at work… yes, the woman who is putting me through the no smoking routine come March…. Ohhh shit, better keep in her good books!!

Priority no 1 – I need a cup of tea….. fruit today me thinks...

Ohhh that just gets right on my tits!

Current mood: irritated
Category: MySpace

You have probably guessed, I quite like 'my space'. Yes I know its hardly ever working correctly and nine time out of ten gives you that "unexpected error" bollocks, but all the same I do get the opportunity to sit here of an evening, normally pissed as a fart talking complete twaddle. So for that – yes, I like it.

What annoys me about the users however… now that's a completely different kettle of fish entirely.

So, you can change the settings so as to block band invites… I chose not to because how on earth are you going to get to hear new and different music without people randomly finding you. I have the opportunity to at least hear the music then choose if I want them on my friends list… simple as that.

So what has really got to me this evening? People who add you only to splat comments on your page about earning money through surveys and such the like. Now excuse me, but the last time I looked I wasn't a complete and utter vegetable and if I want to find this information out I obviously have the ability to Google it and can find it for myself. Do not be some cheeky advertising wanker and slap a comment on my page ref how wonderful your "product" is. Yes it may be the dogs doodahs and earned you a fortune but guess what? I don't care! Go find some other fucking edjit to go get sucked into you commission earning little racket… I'm not going to be one of them.

I have deleted said person from my friends list today as shit like that I can really do without. HOWEVER I know there is one other bird of this nature on my list and by Christ will you get a shouting down should you post anything even remotely survey based on my comments. I like the fact I don't sensor my comments as it leaves people to be spontaneous and mostly funny but if I get one more fucking "you could earn this much" bollocks thing I will hunt you down and piss in your coffee.

Yes, it's been a bad day and "Lillian" just tipped me right over into "EVILCUNTYBITCH FROM HELL" mode.

Happy now Lillian?

Currently watching: Shaun of the Dead

Today is the day then

Current mood: optimistic
Category: Jobs, Work, Careers

Many a promising thing happened so far today. I have just been to collect my nicotine tab things from the doctors, ready for the giving up day on 14^th March… (Shitting yourself yet Widge?) And reading through the booklet has given me the willies once again. Great.

Then we have the pending job interview this afternoon. I'm very prepared for once. Clothes are laid out ready to go, and I'm in a good frame of mind for it and intend to have a nice soak in the bath this morning to allow me to chill a bit should I need it and to make sure I smell nice when there. How very kind of me.

Only one thing could go spectacularly wrong and that is the fact that at the moment, because of call out I have the van. Which means I will have to go down the yard to pick up my car, of which "chunky monkey" Nigel has the key for as he was repairing the rear door during the week. Who's going to have a fiver on the fact that he will go missing, the only key to my car which he has will have vanished or some daft weirdness will ensue to completely balls up me getting to the interview?

Ok so maybe I am a pessimist here but personally I prefer to call it being logical as its guaranteed it will happen… in fact to the word. Or if I am really lucky the bugger won't start.

Oh well here's to being an optimist.

Currently listening: Vivaldi: The Four Seasons By Antonio Vivaldi Release date: 25 October, 1990

Well that was different.

Current mood: accomplished
Category: Life

Up until today I have only ever had two job interviews. The first one was to be an apprentice electrician and the second was an internal one for a job I would never have got as long as I had a hole in my arse (that was the worst one – false advertising from a boss at the time who was a lying cunt if I am honest)

Today was interview number three. I'm not going to say it didn't go well as to be honest I have no idea being so inexperienced with interviews. I was friendly, helpful, full of information… granted some of it probably completely useless but hell I gave it my best shot so we will just have to see how it goes.

The job in question is nothing like what I do now, which is always a challenge and from hearing more about it sounds like just the sort of thing I could do a piece of piss… however the wages look like they could just well be exactly that too… but who cares? Worth a look.

So I shall now completely forget about it all and wait to hear from them (and I know I will forget, far too much other stuff to be doing at the moment)

So not only has the day seemingly gone well, I have come home hauled a shitload of wood for the wood burner into the shed near the house, managed to drink two cans of beer and am feeling what can only be described as "mellow"

I like days like this, I feel I might just be getting somewhere… not fast granted but at least the ball is rolling!

Currently reading: Vintage Stuff By Tom Sharpe Release date: October, 1997

God do I need a drink

Current mood: cranky

I never get like this but for once, typically when I can't drink I am bloody gagging for bit of juice. Bollocks.

And if that wasn't bad enough I have had to drag my sorry arse to the petrol station just to get some fag papers… "Little miss anal" here who never runs out had absolutely none in the house. To top it off the garage was full of wankers as well, none who could make up their minds on anything let alone getting out of the way so this poor bird could get a sodding fag.

The good news is I'm back, have ciggys, can't drink and am sulking like a right bastard.

Sod the world… I'm having a soak in the bath

Currently watching: Top Gear