Tight enough that I won't part with my own blood...

I've always been the proverbial 'stone' when it came to getting blood out of me in the past, even my local doctors surgery has only one nurse who's allowed to pin cushion me these days as she is for want of a better word... bloody good at it.

So imagine my delight today, after 3 days of having the squits, headaches, nausea, stomach cramps & eventually last night chest pains on a quick visit to the quack I am whisked up to the local hospital for tests & a general check up - which happened to also include a shitload of saline solution intravenously due to me being dehydrated.

What a treat!

I warned the first doctor to have a 'stab' excuse the pun, that I was a bugger to get blood out of but she had a good try... 6 tries.

Then the nurse bloke had a go... another 5 tries,

Then the resident doctor... 2 times in the arms... then she suggested the groin...

I could have died at the moment they did that, Most painful thing ever - even breaking my bleeding wrist back in 2002 didn't hurt that much!

Eventually they sent a Dr called Andrew in who is obviously their expert on awkward buggers & he did manage to get the second cannula fitted & managed to remove enough blood to actually be able to test.

Now that was a relief.

The rest of the day has been comprised of an ECG, which was fine. A chest x-ray, also fine & enough saline solution pumped into me to warrant a possible ark construction.

The fact that they did also want me to have an overnight stay didn't really bode too well, so after they witnessed the fact that I wasn't vomiting & also drinking plenty of fluids myself they were happy to send me home.

Don't get me wrong, after 48 hours of nowt to eat I actually appreciated the scary hospital food as I was utterly famished by then also being quite exhausted from being a human pin cushion did manage to get some shut eye whilst in there and so pleased that I would be able to spend the night in my own bed, near my own toilet certainly makes you feel a load better.

Lesson learnt?

Never under any circumstance let anyone try to take blood from your groin.

Also, why have one cannula when you can have two???

*Insert sarcasm here*

Bruised? I should say so.